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Ladies and jellybeans, it is with absolute hyperactivity and inappropriate humor that I give you the latest member to join the “Hey, we kind of like this bald guy” team of sponsors, the one, the only, Snorgtees.com!!

I know, it makes no sense at all. I’m a photographer. They’re a t-shirt company. Why in the world would they want to sponsor me? Well, it honestly comes down to a little word I like to call “awesomenicityness”. 

That’s right. It’s in the index of your Fast Track to Not Really Being a Photographer handbook. Awesomenicityness.

Once you achieve it, people literally line up at your door simply to give you free stuff, publish you, carry you on their shoulders while parading you around town, feeding you grapes, caressing your toes with lavender infused lens cloths…..because YOU…are rocktastical. 

OK, none of the above is actually true, except for the part about Snorgtees.com being a totally and completely fantastic online t-shirt company that I’ve loved forever, and for some reason I have yet to comprehend, they offered to sponsor me in exchange for me modeling their awesome shirts on my abnormally large and sexy body. And maybe giving a few away now and again, which I’m all for. I get to model. You get free shirts. Everyone wins. 

Except Samuel L. Jackson. He never wins.

I digress. 

All that said, I love their shirts and of course want to give one away. It’s what I do. I love something, I pass it on to you guys. *flex* 

Here’s the scoop, ready?

All you have to do is go to their website, here

Pick out your favorite style, and leave a comment below letting me know which one’s your fav. 

One week from today, a comment will be randomly picked and you, the lucky schmuck that left it, will get a free shirt from Snorgtees.com

Simple huh?

Again, this giveaway will end on Monday, October 18th. 

Many thanks and much love to Snorgtees.com for making me look way cooler than I actually am by supplying me with abnormally sexy shirts, and having the audacity to be associated with me publicly. 

Best of luck ~

B
  • Linda Logsdon - I like Whiskers & Rex Attorneys at AWWWW the best. First of all, Lawyers will “shed” light on your situation, “hiss” and “bark” at any objections, “claw” their way through your money, and “purr” and “wag their tails” when they get it.ReplyCancel

  • paveiphotos - OMG… “my butt hurts” it my favorite!!!!ReplyCancel

  • Andrea Murphy - Its gotta be the Sedimentary My Dear Watson shirt. Its the perfect gift for my dad: humor that mixes geology and Sherlock Holmes.ReplyCancel

  • Nikola - “Tigers love pepper, they hate cinnamon” is my favReplyCancel

  • Tatjanna Miller - oh man Brett, That’s a tough one….I mean all the physics and monty Python references and the elephant one just makes me *giggle* But in the end..My fav is..

    What floats in water.
    A:Bread
    B:Apples
    c:Small Rocks
    D: Ducks…

    Because we all know what the real answer is!ReplyCancel

  • Joe Treadaway - Toughest contest yet Brett! I have to go with the scrabble shirt…

    Sometimes alcohol is the answer!ReplyCancel

  • Christina LeMarr - Ok, that took awhile to pick, but I’ll go with “i have not yet begun to procrastinate” great site!!!ReplyCancel

  • Meg - I’ll take one of each, thank you.

    The grammar one is my favorite, closely followed by the “solve your own problems” math shirt. God I’m a nerd. #headslapReplyCancel

  • eric - i choose the “may the mass times acceleration be with you” 🙂ReplyCancel

  • Tracy - I liked the “Not a Morning Person” one!!!ReplyCancel

  • Jeremiah Daniel - I’m pretty much in love with the Cow “I am your Father” one. Sweet.ReplyCancel

  • Kelley - Dang, that was tough! Being entirely selfish, I’d have to go with the unicorn watching the winged horse fly away and thinking “Lucky”— because it made me giggle and feel sad for the unicorn at the same time. Poor unicorn. It’s like those poor ugly babies you want to tell the owners of is cute, but you just can’t, and so you say something like, “Oh, how wonderful! A baby! Gosh, that’s great… how are you sleeping?”. Or the puppy that didn’t get the cool spots and no one wants to take him home. I’d wear this shirt to work. I would become the “hip” gal in my trendy and hip t-shirt. It would be most awesome. I would wear my hip plaid Converse and low cut jeans and this t-shirt would make me feel like I was the coolest chick in the room. oh yeah…
    http://www.snorgtees.com/unluckyunicorn-p-492.html?osCsid=c003070d56c4c25230c911389cb9a423ReplyCancel

  • Candace - So, I’m a pretty big fan of the “I have not yet begun to procrastinate” as well as the “Dear Math” shirtReplyCancel

  • Rachel - Ha! Those are hilarious! Its so hard to choose, but I think my favorite is the “choose wisely” shirt, we use the good old RPS (rock paper scissors) decision framework often at work! 🙂 i would be the hit of the water cooler!ReplyCancel

  • Brett - It’s midnight! With help from my favorite random selection website, Random.org, the winner of the Snorgtees.com shirt is comment #10, Tracy!

    If you can shoot me an email with your info, I’ll pass it along to the good folks at Snorgtees.com and you’ll get your shirt! Thanks everyone for commenting!!

    BReplyCancel

Like most unexpected good things, I wasn’t actually looking for it when I found it. 

I was three weeks into the last road trip of this year, a month long trek that took me from Florida to weddings in San Francisco, Tulsa, St. Louis and Lake Tahoe, with an engagement session in Chicago thrown in for good measure. In total I put over 11,000 miles on the rental car in one month. I would say that I’m worn out from driving, but I’d do it again in a heartbeat, so I’m not sure that counts. 

This particular moment came during a morning walk in the redwoods while camping in Big Sur, California between weddings. I can’t even describe how beautiful the woods are there, or how quiet everything gets once you walk into them a good distance. The ground is covered with clover everywhere you look. Gigantic redwood trees towering above you, some which have fallen long ago, the trunks of which are now covered with thick, green moss. The smell of the woods, the leaves, the smoke from the campfires back at the campground, and the smell of the salty sea air, as the coast isn’t but a mile or so from you. I tried to take photos of what I was seeing, but no picture could actually capture being there. The crisp morning air, the sounds, the smells. But, knowing that I’d eventually sit down and try to relay the experience to you, the dedicated few that keep up with my ramblings,  I wanted to get at least a few shots. 

I’d knelt down to take a shot of a random patch of clover, briefly glanced around for the ever-elusive one with four leaves, and instead found one with only one leaf. And lo and behold, it had the shape of a heart. Now, you can feel free to insert your own ” finding love in the most unexpected places” analogy here, but simply the fact that it looked like a heart and was growing quite happily having only one leaf made it pretty cool to me. 

I was lucky enough to be able to travel the Pacific Coast Highway in California twice this year. I’ve driven it three times so far, and I’m still in constant awe of the coastline, the little towns along the way, and my favorite spot of all, Big Sur.

There’s one campground in particular that has become my retreat from all things hectic and stressful. It’s got a convenience store, a bar and a restaurant where you can actually get wifi should you need it, and several gorgeous camping spots along the Big Sur river which runs through the middle of the campground. The name of the campground is Fernwood Resort, and if you find yourself anywhere near it, you owe it to yourself to at least spend a night or two there. It’s the one spot that I can honestly remember being completely and totally relaxed this year. Granted, it’s been a really crazy and weird year, but sitting around a campfire when it’s chilly outside, the sound of the river (which is actually more of a creek) running next to the campsite, any number of fellow campers that wander by and say hello, a cold beer and absolutely no cell phone reception, is one of the greatest ways I can think of to relax for a few days in between weddings.

If you do care to venture forth from the campground, you can drive 2 miles down Highway 1 and come to a state park with beach access where you can sit and watch the surf, hunt for starfish in the tide pools, or watch sea lions in the water. It’s honestly one of the most beautiful spots I’ve seen in my travels, and I greatly enjoy it there. 

 

I’ll leave you with a random gathering of some of the shots I took while in that area this year. I’ll admittedly say I am in no way a landscape photographer, but simply shot what I saw. 

All the best ~

B

 

  • Shayna - Brett, I say it again….Coffee table book titled “Roadside Ramblings from a Roving Photographer”. These are wonderful!ReplyCancel

*A forlorn roadside Howard Johnson hotel~ 2:45 AM ~ Freezing cold*

 

This hotel room scares me.

 

The bedspread looks like the illegitimate love-child of the interior of a Ford Pinto and a really bad paisley tie, the carpet is oddly sticky, and the coffee pot has a beautiful lavender shade of mold growing inside. The multi purpose  air-conditioner/heater/ice-maker/curling iron window unit doesn’t work, which I didn’t discover until a few moments ago, and as I have no desire to pack everything back up and switch rooms, I’m wrapped in the illegitimate love-child bedspread while writing. I’m not a fan of this room.

But, I’m more of a fan of this hotel than the Days Inn outside of St. Charles, Missouri I had the unfortunate experience of staying at for a few days this year. I can’t accurately describe to you the exact level of funk that existed in that room, but between the large quantity of what I can only assume was dog hair on the carpet,  and the distinct odor of sweaty feet and corn chips that permeated the entire room, it wins the “Absolute worst hotel I’ve stayed at in three years of crazy road trips” award. Oddly enough, the second worst hotel I’ve stayed in this year was also a Days Inn, but this time in Key West, Florida. It wins the ” Our rooms look clean, comfortable and somewhat non-repulsive on our website, but when you get here they’re seriously disgusting and humid and tiny and yes you can have a bigger, nicer room but only if you pay us lots of money” award. 

Come to think of it, the Hallmark Inn in Newport, Oregon was super nice, complete with ocean view and fireplace. I could use a fireplace right about now. Then there was the Doubletree Hotel in Orlando, Florida. Super nice place that included an extremely arrogant French concierge whose life was saved by the freshly baked warm cookie he handed me. I can deal with a lot of idiocy if someone hands me a cookie, either during or shortly after said idiocy occurs. The Millennium Knickerbocker (say that with a mouthful of cookies) hotel in downtown Chicago, Illinois wins for coolest vintage hotel, most awesome shower and also the tiniest rooms you could possibly imagine. 

The Holiday Inn at the San Francisco, California airport needs better parking but has a great bar, the Ramada in San Diego has a great wine and cheese hour in the evenings and is in walking distance to the greatest Mexican restaurant I’ve been to, the Hyatt Regency in Sarasota, Florida wins for best balcony view this year, again with the great bar, and the Hilton in St. Petersburg, Florida wins for best on-site fitness center and spa. Plus, they make really great brownies, which kind of defeats the purpose of the gym, but whatever.

 

You may ask yourself, after reading that lengthy bit of rambling, what exactly the point of this blog is. And to be honest with you, there’s not one. 

I’m cold. I can’t sleep. This room is creepy. 

But since you made it through all of that, I’ll be nice and show you a picture. It’s what I do. 

 

Behold my precious babies, in one of my first attempts at getting them to be serious in front of the camera a few years ago. 

~ B

 

 

  • Tatjanna Miller - I really liked this blog, ranting or not, it’s very descriptive! LOL. Maybe it’s all the years on the road with my dad sleeping in the back of a semi truck, or my moms “camping adventures” that would last 5 months at a time where a river was a bath, or my hitchhiking to get in touch with some fashion Jack Kerouac, implanted into my mind after reading “On the Road” when I was 17. But I really like old run down hotel rooms, even the creepy ones, it gives me a feeling of adventure (after of course you’ve had a good shower and are back on the road and all said creepiness is worn off) in 2007 my friends and I rented 3 of the priciest suites in the Hotel Murano in Tacoma WA..I hated it, I felt like I had to tip toe through the place…I’m by no means a slob, but when a place is that Clean I feel bad for making extra work for the maids. Worst motel adventure for me though was the Budget inn in Havre Montana….And it was just renamed from the “Shanty inn” that should tell ya something lol…sorry for hijacking the comments..it’s too late at night and I can’t sleep either!ReplyCancel

  • Polka Dot Bride - Oh your babies are gorgeous!

    Sleep tightReplyCancel

  • Jiuli - There is nothing worse than a scary hotel room….I say run to your car and sleep there. Safe travels! 🙂ReplyCancel

  • Joe Treadaway - I’ve seen YOU make that face in the lower left hand corner…that’s a riot!!!ReplyCancel

One of the greatest couples, during one of the greatest road trips, in one incredible city. 

I only wish they weren’t afraid to show some personality in front of the camera…..

~ B

 

  • Moose - Thanks for stopping by our fair city, you should have told me. You me Scott and Ken could have had a beer outside Balboa park, well if we flew them in.
    Great shots.
    MooseReplyCancel

  • Kim Hartmann - love these shots! they look like so much fun to be around!ReplyCancel

Someone asked me yesterday how I would describe Key West.

My first instinct was to say it’s New Orleans, without the majority of the foul stench, crime, music, and Cajun food. But if you take all that away, it’s not really New Orleans now is it?

Key West is it’s own little world, and that’s the best way to describe it. Complete island atmosphere, incredible food, more bars than you can stagger through in 3 days, and any and all kinds of tourist shops, hand-rolled cigar stands, and anything else you can imagine on a little street called Duval. And it’s a cardinal rule that if you’re going to spend any time at all on Duval street in Key West, it’s a good idea to have a wingman (or woman) to make sure you don’t accidentally end up in one of those bars where all the sweaty old guys are watching all the sweaty young guys prance around in speedos. 

That’s right. Prance. 

And to be honest, it happens to a majority of hapless tourists wandering around Duval Street, simply trying to find a drink, and walking through the first open door that looks (somewhat) like a bar. They’re not exactly marked well. It’s entirely possible that you could stagger in such an establishment, alone, in search of a beer, and come out with a few phone numbers, a five dollar bill stuffed inside your belt, a look of confusion and a twinge of guilt. You’d know something terribly wrong just happened, but you now have five dollars so you’re not going to question it.

Which actually describes an internet date I had once, but I digress. 

During this particular trip, I had the very cool opportunity to work with photographer extraordinaire Kirsten Larsson of KirstenAlana.com. She’s an excellent photographer, a complete and total travel buff, has the ability to both endure a road trip with me and serve as a bodyguard on Duval Street against all characters of questionable morality. I’ll proudly work with her again anytime. 

* Side thought ~ If you’re ever in the Miami, Florida area picking up someone from the airport, and just happen to get bored waiting on said person’s flight to show up, and want to drive around looking for thrift stores, hear me when I tell you to completely ignore that urge. Google Maps led me to what was supposed to be a Goodwill, but in reality was Bubba’s House of Bouncing Bunnies, I can only assume which was shut down due to the bullet holes in the door and the crime scene tape strung across the parking lot. It’s not the safest area in the world really.

For those of you (lucky enough to be) unfamiliar with my first encounter with Key West as a photographer, you can read about that here.

For  everyone else already inducted into my Really Awkward and Wayward Ramblings story club, or R.A.W.R, you’ll be slightly disappointed to know that there was in fact no attempt made to relocate the rock ray during this trip. Perhaps another day. 

Trish and Joe, your wedding was perfect. Sincere thanks for the opportunity to spend some time in one of my all time favorite places, with some really, really great people. 

*wedding held at Fort Zachary Taylor state park

* reception held at The Rooftop Cafe

~ B

 

 

  • Joe Treadaway - So here is what I have to say about working with Brett and Kirsten…AWESOME.

    Our entire wedding was the most amazing time with family and friends. We met Bret and Kirsten on Duval St. a couple of nights before the wedding. A great time was had by all. Having the two of them allowed us to capture moments in time that we couldn’t have imagined with only one photographer. I wasn’t supposed to see my bride before the wedding, but I can’t tell you how amazing it was to see all of the pictures of her getting ready for our special day. Brett and Kirsten froze time for us with the most beautiful shots that we could have imagined. From the bottom of our hearts, thank you!

    Brett also doubles as a fashion consultant. Good call on the flops instead of shoes brother. If it weren’t for Brett and Kirsten, we would also be without the legend of the Duval St. Landshark as well.

    So if you are looking for someone that can pretty much act as a fashion consultant, mixologist, tour guide, wedding planner, and oh yeah one helluva photographer, Brett is your guy.

    He has been threatening to meet us in an Irish pub somewhere up here in the northeast or maybe back in Key West sometime soon.

    Until then…

    nothing but love for you brother,

    Joe & TrishReplyCancel

  • Kirsten - Brett – seriously fun working with you. Never have I had a weekend wearing my wedding photographer hat where I have enjoyed myself so much. Never. Landshark disaster aside, very seriously, I am game to be your second anytime. Drop of a hat, I’m there! And wow, we make a good team eh?! These images are FABULOUS!

    Trish & Joe – you are two of the most awesome people I’ve ever had the privilege to work for. I cannot put into words how awesome it was to be part of your wedding photography team. And your families are amazing as well. What a blessing this experience was!!! Many many good wishes for you both and your future together!ReplyCancel